Resources
Relationship Shit
The 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse
Gottman Institute
The 4 predictors of divorce or separation with 93.6% accuracy over thousands of couples over many decades. These are the 4 things to get better at and how in 2 mins.
Gottman Institute
Dr. John Gottman
Research-based approach to navigating relationships. Full talk.
This is not love guru bullshit. This is a career scientist who has studied thousands of couples for decades and has pinpointed the things that predictably lead to either fulfilled relationships or divorce. And he just tells you what they are and how to be amazing at them.
Fight Less, Connect More
Cinema Therapy
First lesson from Therapist Jonathan Decker’s series Fight Less, Connect More. The hour-version covers how to navigate conflict without being avoidant or attacking, how to identify what’s under your anger, & how to communicate real shit with the end goal in mind: having peace and fulfillment with each other. You can join their Patreon to access the full hour & a bunch of other courses.
7 Movie Marriages That Are ACTUALLY Healthy
Cinema Therapy
Therapist Jono and filmmaker Alan (best friends and internet dads) rank and explain what works about them and how you can do it too.
Stress
Effective Communication Podcast
Higher State of Being Podcast
featuring Danielle Rachlin
Why are you so mad? Why can’t I shake how pissed off I am? How can you think like that?? Explore some of the neuroscience of communication and social connection to effectively navigate healthy human interactions.
Notice the Knowns Hypnosis
Theadora Sophia, Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist
Remember what your stress center needs to down-regulate? The predictable and familiar. This meditation lets you bring your attention to the knowns when your world is uncertain.
Take a Deep Breath
Calm
Take a moment with this easy breathing technique.
Then put it in your back pocket for as one of your tools. Explore box breathing or other techniques as a daily practice or as an in-the-moment tool.
How to Make Stress Your Friend
Kelly McGonigal
Stress is inevitable. Here’s how to make it GOOD for you.
Courage, Vulnerability, Shame
The Biggest Shame Trigger for Men
Brené Brown
And what they’re starting to realize about it.
What Would You Say to All the Men of the World?
Brené Brown
We already know, guys. Lean into the discomfort.
The Power of Vulnerability
Brené Brown
Do you identify as brave? Turns out that’s vulnerability. Don’t like that? Then I’m afraid this is required viewing.
Listening to Shame
Brené Brown
If you liked the first video, here’s the follow-up. With a bit more of a focus on men, an underrepresented demographic for this topic.
Self Exploration
Find a Therapist
Psychology Today
Use the filters to explore therapists that you would enjoy working with one-on-one.
What Should You Do With Your Life?
Mark Manson
Some people know what they want to do with their lives right off the bat. Fuck those people.
Most of us think about this question all wrong. Settle down and think about it like this.
Archetype Cards
Caroline Myss
These are not tarot cards. I highly recommend looking through these and identifying which archetypes are most highly represented in your identity. (My primary ones are Queen, Mother, & Lover. ) Understanding these core aspects of who you are can give you (& others) language to understanding more about your self, identity, choices, & ways of interpreting your world.
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck (Summary by Author)
Mark Manson
My favorite book for stepping into yourself. Get the audiobook from your library and listen to it.
An Antidote to Dissatisfaction
Kurzgesagt - In a Nutshell
“It feels almost insulting, like things shouldn’t be that simple. But in numerous studies, the participants reported more happiness and a higher general life satisfaction after doing this practice for a few weeks. And even more, studies have found changes in brain activity some months after they end it.”
How to Take Ownership When It Isn’t Your Fault
Jocko Willink
Jocko is a retired US Navy SEAL with a mission to teach everyone the secret to being a good leader, a good team-member, a good partner, the best version of yourself through Extreme Ownership. Listen to the audiobook from the library and watch how approaching your world like this changes everything.
When You Just Ain’t Got It Together
Dry Creek Wrangler School
Some cowboy wisdom.
Optimistic Nihlism
Kurzgesagt - In a Nutshell
Are you getting caught in in the meaninglessness of it all? Dude. That’s not depressing. That’s INCREDIBLE! Let this cartoon teach you how fucking amazing that makes your life. I mean it.
Relax
Take a Min & Watch This Beautiful Beach Sunset With Me (Unedited)
Danielle Rachlin - Natural Wanders Nonprofit
No dialogue, unedited coloring. Just settle in to this quiet nature moment of rich colors and sounds of waves crashing. Made by Danielle.
I Call It Savor Hiking
Danielle Rachlin - Natural Wanders Nonprofit
Get hypnotized in redwood trees. Made by Danielle.
Vagus Nerve Yoga
Dr. Arielle Schwartz specializes in vagal toning and physical practices for down-regulation and physical and mental relief. She has lots of full classes on her YouTube - here’s a short 15 min option.
African Safari Scenic Relaxation
Scenic Relaxation
Animals will make you feel better. Pick a country or region of the world and get lost there for a while.
100 Hour Fudgy Brownies
Get hypnotized by chocolate.
Sand Cutting
Find yourself something that’s weirdly soothing for you. It seriously does not matter what.
Sleep
Theadora Sophia, Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist
15 mins.
Theadora Sophia, Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist
15 mins.
Joe Pera Talks You Back to Sleep
Joe Pera Talks With You - Adult Swim
Simple comedian relaxes you to sleep. 10 mins.
Truly Boring Fairy Tales
Casper ft. Nothing Much Matters
Nod off to the whimsical wonders of your favorite fairy tales with an unbelievably snooze-worthy twist.
Books
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck
A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life
Mark Manson
Hyperbole and a Half
Unfortunate Situations, Flawed Coping Mechanisms, Mayhem, and Other Things That Happened
Allie Brosh
Extreme Ownership
How US Navy Seals Lead and Win
Jocko Willink & Leif Babin
Guide to Getting It On!
(If you want to be a good lover, get. this. book.)
Paul Joannides & Daerick Gross
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
Stephen Covey
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens
Sean Covey
Suicidal or Self-Harm Ideation
If you are or think you might be having a crisis, call or text 988 to talk to a trained professional at a suicide crisis center. It is 24/7, free, and confidential.
If you or someone you love is having thoughts of self-harm or suicidal ideology, please call/text 988 for support now and get resources or chat at the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline site.
Risk Factors & Warning Signs
Call/Text 988
24/7, Free, Confidential
Safety Plans Work
Call/Text 988
24/7, Free, Confidential